Let it Go ~ Parenting 405

Apr 28, 2014

Nobody ever tells you about Parenting 405 … they only share with you articles that are so cleverly titled Parenting 101 and the like. My daughter is now 6 and a half [which the half is very important. Do not forget the half!] and I have learned to let a lot go. In her earlier years I had all of the, “What to expect books”, all of the copies of the Parenting Magazine, and several other Parenting 101 paraphernalia.

Everything about those books is very text book. Do this_this_ and _this and you will have the picture perfect child. My class of Parenting 405 is different. Nowadays, I’m learning to let it go.

Let go of my plans for the day, because there is nothing like a procrastinating six year old that can jack your plans.

Let go of my pride over the dinner I just made because a little human is making gaging sounds. Apparently she doesn’t like Spaghetti Squash.

Let go of sleeping alone in my bed with my husband(whom we occasionally share with our dogs and two cats) because inevitably around 6 a.m. a little human will snuggle in.

Let go of every insecurity I have because I will gain more every day when I see other mothers parenting more “perfectly than I”

Let go of other peoples “sure fire advice”. Screw that. Every kid is different, and most of the time parenting advice does not magically fix every problem.

Let go of my inability to listen to other peoples sure fire advice, because sometimes it works.

Let go of watching TV at regular times, because the kids might still be up, and the Good Wife is not appropriate for your 6 year old!

Let go of a picture perfect clean home! Sure when we have company our home can be almost model show home clean, but most of the time it is LIVED IN, and by lived in, I mean if you didn’t have kids you would be worried.

Let go of what I am dressed like, or my lack of makeup on most days. Sometimes its a miracle that we made it out of the house!

Let go of judging other parents in the check out lane. You will be in that struggle some day too my friend. Do I even need to explain.

Let go of comparing yourself to “fit mom”. I’m not giving free pass to eat bon bons every night, and never workout, but if you skip your walk/run/workout because your’e too tired… count your blessings that you’re too tired to workout because after all you’re keeping a human alive!

Let go of any preconceived idea of what motherhood and parenthood is. It is not a standard operating procedure its a living, breathing adventure that is never the same for two people, and it can change at the drop of a hat.

Oh I could go on and on.

I’m learning to live in the moment, and cherish every moment. This is a hard hard thing for me as I am an event planner by trade, and every bone in my body screams for a logistics document for life, and motherhood, but there is none. You cannot write it, you cannot plan for it. Motherhood as best as I can describe is like a bull ride. Hang on as long as you can. Fake it ’till you make it! My struggles will never go away. I may learn to handle them differently as I get older, but as I get older my child will get older and enter a new phase in life, and I will have to let that go as well.

I was listening to Focus on Parenting on the way home today, and they were talking about how as a parent, you will never reach a day where you can check off parenting and call it a success. Every day a new challenge will arise, and if it doesn’t, hold on for a few days. I’m learning to let go of what I want,and how I think things will go. Motherhood has shattered my pride.

I’m blessed with the best gifts of motherhood. The best ones of all….

Love . Happiness . Honesty . Patience . Grace . Humility.

Let It Go! ~ Dinner

Apr 10, 2014

Inspired by many of my friends posting tonight about their kids singing “Let It Go” join me on a brand new series titled… “Let It Go”.

Sometimes I have a hard time letting things go…. Over the next several weeks join me on my new series of letting things go. From cooking, to parenting styles, lessons on forgiveness, and spring cleaning!

I am definitely the planning ahead of time type of girl. I cannot stand anything more than not knowing what I’m going to be doing in a particular day. In fact I found a very nifty app called the Cozi Calendar which has all but changed my life, and you might want to check out if you’re the kind of person who is like me… Everything from school activities to evening activities is completely synchronized between my husband and I’s iPhones. Now there is never the, “You never told me that we had xyz going on tonight…” Seriously, filling in my tasks, and outings in my calendar/planner gives me one of the greatest joys in life. (Moreover I do not argue with you that I am a weirdo.)

For years, I have definitely been the meal planning type of wife and mom. Oftentimes I’m planning at least a week in advance if not a few weeks and sometimes even a whole month. I would be hardly caught dead ordering fast food for the night, (and I do not judge those of you who do) although the occasional pizza delivery or Chipotle slips, but the truth is, I absolutely LOVE cooking. In my next life I am definitely going to be an executive gourmet chef, or maybe start a food blog… or maybe this will start turning into a food blog!

I’ve never quite understood women who didn’t meal plan and thought to myself, “How did they know what to eat for dinner?”

I love having my dinners for the week written very neatly in my calendar, and on my meal chalkboard next to my stove with hyperlinks to the menus that I am going use for that night.

What is happening though is that generally on Fridays or Saturdays after work I would hit the grocery store with my list of items that I needed to buy for the next week or two. But of course the inevitable happens. Schedules get overloaded, emergencies come up and I’m not having the time to prepare these extravagant meals… So we would either call for pizza or make something completely different using only a quarter or half of the ingredients I had allotted for that particular day.

Thanks to my church I now keep a budget. Like a corporate style budget for my family. While seeing what our actuals were for the month of March I discovered that we spent over $600 on groceries! Yes you read that right… for a family of THREE and that was ONLY groceries! I hang my head in shame. I can tell you we probably did not eat $600 dollars’ worth of groceries…

So… my husband and I decided to alter our plans to be a tad more on the fly! Sure I still have ideas of what I want to make for the week, or the next several days, but instead of shopping for a whole week or month, I now just get what we needed for a particular night or the next couple nights, and then using the left over ingredients up in the next few nights dinners. Plus on the account of the fact that we have so much venison and poultry there is no reason to be spending that much in groceries.

So far we’re already drastically under March’s budget actuals. (Moreover we are only a third through April!) We have a lot less waste, and there is more room for creativity on my part. I have even been throwing together dishes that sound good in my head without following any kind of recipe and its really freeing. Absolutely freeing.

Stay tuned my friends to the series, “Let It Go” over the next few weeks. What are some of the things you need to let go of? Comment below!

Minnesota – Week 14

Apr 5, 2014

{PupDate}

Life with puppy has been going wonderful! I swear this is the most low key dog we’ve ever owned. He is very go with the flow, and very low energy. We just took Niko to our brand new veterinarian today, for shots and an exam (After a lengthy and thorough search I think we finally found a new and good vet clinic since we’ve dealt with a bit of hell with our old ones)… and things went really good. Niko checked out perfectly. This new vet seems pretty legit. His favorite dog breeds include Pit Bulls, and Rottweilers, so I think he’ll be very comfortable with our Corso. He actually listens to us, and shares some of our same opinions, (read: thinks its ridiculous to neuter dogs at 6 months old due to stunting proper growth development, and can lead to osteosarcoma) and is very affordable so I think we’ll stay with him for a while.

Niko Stats:
11 Weeks
24.6 Pounds
Eats aproximately 3 cups of Large Breed Puppy – Nutrisource three times per day.

Sadie Stats:
2 years, 7 months
20.5 pounds (a wee bit overweight)
Eats just a handful of low fat NutriSourse three times per day. I just bought Just a WEE BIT small breed dog food since the low fat wasn’t doing a THING. Just as people NEED fat to loose fat I’m going to see if the same idea applies to dogs. Currently her food has 9g of fat per serving, and the new food has 18g of fat. Also now that its nicer out I hope to exercise her more.

Niko is becoming more much more playful and alert. Was very sleepy the first week or two we brought him home. Still takes lots of naps, but is awake for about an hour or more at a time now before sleep takes over.

Favorite toys right now are:
* Kips tail (likes to try to play tug of war WITH the cat), slowly getting over that in turn for chasing the cats and asserting his dominance over them.
* Ropes (supervised)
* Licking peanut butter out of Kongs
* Rubber Tug/chew toys
* Likes to play tug (we win every time).

He sleeps in the kennel next to our bed at night, and quiets down fairly quickly without much help. Sleeps from about 11pm-6am, or midnight to 7:00 a.m. He’s right on cue, so I hardly even need an alarm clock. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night, but for the most part, he sleeps about 6-7 hours per night.

During the day he is in the hallway and bathroom (bathroom is puppy proofed) and he has toys , and a rest area. He doesn’t even pout when we leave him there, and isn’t going off the wall bonkers when we get home. Luckily with this wild MN weather Jason has been home many days which is helping out HUGE in the socialization and potty training department. Honestly he hardly ever has an accident. (Quick find some wood for me to knock on!)

Wednesday evenings he goes to puppy playtime to get some socialization with other dogs. He is doing exceptionally well, and although I feel like I’m bragging, he’s doing better than several of his classmates that are older than himself. I’ve told Jason I bet he could do agility once he’s older. We’ll possibly continue on that.

He has been to the groomer officially. Doesn’t love being sprayed with water, but doesn’t mind the drier. I hope he likes the water since we go camping and fishing and are always on the water.

He gets along with Sadie, our Jack Russell Terrier. They love to snuggle together for naps, and romp around during playtime. They both like to gang up on the cats which we’re trying to break them of. They usually go after our torishell Manx Breanna who is more sensitive anyways. They hardly ever go after Kip.

We recently signed up for barkbox.com. Have you ever heard of it? It seems pretty awesome…. Each month you receive a box in the mail filled with new and cool toys like bumi brand and natural dog treats and training treats etc. Its cool because you get new toys, and new treats for about the same cost as you would spend regardless. Plus a part of the proceeds goes towards animal rescue.

Thats it for now. Stay tuned for another PupDate!

Minnesota – Week 13

Apr 1, 2014

Motivation

Its finally April, yet it does still look like late February up here in Minnesota, and its going to get worse before it gets better.

After I’ve realized I am NOT getting to the gym like I used to, I invested in a set of Kettlebells. I found a few videos I like online from Pinterest, and its been going alright. (Okay I’ll be honest.. I’ve used them three times.)

I’ve also just started “running” again which I’ll use that term loosely, because usually I am such a fair weather runner kind of girl. For the most part all of the conditions have to be just right, or this girl aint gettin’ on her running shoes! Sometimes I like to run in wild weather, but mostly I’m picky… and full of excuses. Really I’m an excuse factory.

After a long sabbatical from running completely I’m ready to start again. This time focusing on shorter distances, since I feel this is where my sweet spot really lies. My PR is a 23:00 5K and this year I want to beat it. (I said it, and now I’m scared. I want to take it back, that was 11 years ago….What if I fail?) I have completely started over doing a couch to 5K program basically, because sadly that’s where I’m at. I think I could run for 3-4 miles straight, but it would be ugly, and my body would feel betrayed for days. So instead I’m taking it slow, and steady, and after I’ve been reconditioned I will really start training!

In addition to the 5Ks, I may possibly do a Sprint Triathlon or two since I absolutely love Tris… but nothing has been set in stone as of now,which is quite fine by me. In order to practice the swimming discipline that would involve going to the gym, and we’ve already covered that. I haven’t signed up for anything yet, and I like the lack of pressure that not being signed up for races brings.

In the past I would sign up for races and say to others that I sign up so, “I will run” and then feel overly pressured into training and agonize over missed runs, and eventually feel like a failure. So I’m not signing up for anything yet. I want to run because I like it, not because I have to for training.

When I need motivation, I usually turn to Pinterest to look at all of the inspirational quotes and pictures. Here are a few of my favorites:

So tell me… how do you stay motivated to lace up your running shoes and hit the pavement? Please drop a line below, and share a thought or two 🙂

Here’s to lacing up!

Minnesota – Week 12

Mar 27, 2014

Quarterly Goals Review

Last NYE I set out to list some goals for all to see. So I’ve decided once per quarter I would grade myself and update everyone since I feel a bit accountable to you all! If you don’t remember my original post, or are late to the party, here it is… but for your sake, I’ve listed what I set out to do in 2014.

1.) If I say I’m going to pray for someone – doing it right away. A

So far this goal of mine is working like a charm! Of course I still slip up and forget to pray for people sometimes, but for the most part I quit whatever I’m doing if possible on the spot and pray for the situation/person immediately. Also for lent I’ve assigned forty people in my life for each day during lent, and have been praying for them. Today is for one of my friends in my small group.

2.) Get more organized A-

Not only am I now blogging on a more regular basis, I’ve officially gotten my E-Hoarding under control, and we’re making progress on our home organization as well. The Living Room, Kitchen and Bathroom are pretty well organized. Just ahead of getting our new puppy we went through some major organizing, and got rid of a lot of stuff, put it in storage, or just downright threw it away. Being organized feels so good! My mom always raised us to be “neat freaks” and I’m finally catching on! You’re welcome mom!

3.) Keep fit/eat healthy B okay a C

Meh… I’d give myself a solid B or C in this department. It seems that I go almost bi-polar in this department. Sometimes I’m eating very “clean” lots of real food, and good choice carbs, and working out consistently, and other times I get home from work, and want to munch on some pretzles, eat a bunch of “carbage” (bad for you carbs) and have a glass (or two) of wine and workout shmerkout.

I did purchase some kettelbells however, and have started running again! So far I’m doing okay in the running department. I started ALL the way over (stay tuned for a future blog post about that) so I’m walking and running currently.

4.) Sleep Better D-

I almost gave myself a complete F, but there was that one week or two that I was doing fantastic. But for whatever reason I just can’t make myself go to bed before midnight. I’ve been this way ever since I was a young girl, or so my mother has told me. I absolutely HATE going to bed… maybe i feel like I might miss out on something I don’t know… but I do know I’d be much more refreshed if I just set a bedtime and stuck to it. I would be healthier too… but as I’m learning about myself, I am SUPER surprisingly somewhat of an introvert, and I desperately need time to myself to decompress before I go to bed. My time to myself is usually between 10pm- midnight… Which is why I usually write at night! :-).

5.) Make more memories A

This is going well! We took our first solo family trip to California last month, and we as a family had an amazing time. We couldn’t have asked for better behavior from our daughter, and we had a great time ourselves. We are still playing game night, although not quite as often as when I was off for nearly two weeks over Christmas break! We will continue however. We have a few camping trips planned, and Disney in the next year or two.

6.) Slow down A

I used to be go-go-go every night of the week, but in 2013 I radically changed this after desperately needing nights to myself. This is when I first discovered I might actually have a somewhat introverted personality. I cannot stand going out more than I am at home. To me, there is nothing better than coming home from a day at work, cooking for my family, watching the shows that I love, or writting, reading, and then eventually going to bed. I learned to be a “no” person, instead of the “yes” person I always used to be. Not to say that I said No to every opportunity, because I am currently taking on a lot of volunteering at my daughters school, but this meant sometimes saying no to friends, or myself when I already had 3 or 4 other things going on that week. The payout has been amazing. Just spending a night at home vegging out, or allowing myself the opportunity to just sit on the deck in the summer and share a glass of wine with the neighbors was so needed! Finally I felt like I could breathe, and recharge. I can’t wait to see this in action for ALL of 2014.

7.) Don’t be afraid to try new things B

I have tried a few new things. Any time that I’m at a pot-luck I try something I never would have tried in the past. I just tell myself to not be afraid… I’ve found i’ve actually really liked certain things. While I like change I am at times scared to try new things. I’ve turned down a few things, but i”m progressing.

8.) Kayak Rice Creek n/a

Okay have you seen our ridiculous winter? Obviously this goal is not applicable at the moment… but once the melt happens…. I’ve actually gone into outlook and booked out three weekends that I will attempt to go! So unless there is a major family emergency, or the weather is unfavorable I WILL be going one of those three weekends.

So that’s my goal review in a nutshell. I will update you again next quarter, and let you know how I’m progressing. Thanks always for reading! Stay tuned for a new post on Running + , and my quest to start running again!

Be her friend

Mar 21, 2014

I am terrified. The day that I came home with my brand new baby swaddled tightly from the hospital I was terrified….and I think that it will get easier as my child grows older, but it doesn’t really get easier, it just gets more terrifying. Instead of worrying about our child suddenly forgetting how to breathe in the middle of the night, we are now afraid that our child will be bullied on the playground, choke on food, get kidnapped by the ice cream truck man, get left out of the lunch table crowd, dress too provocatively, or take drugs at a party to be cool and the list just goes on and on and on.

I was too recently reminded of a friend of mine and her families story. Because it is her story I won’t go into too much detail, but her daughters boyfriend attended a party where other kids had this new “cool” synthetic drug.. and he and died tragically because of its effects. I don’t know that boys specific families story or how involved they were in their child’s life, but it makes me terrified that my daughter will want to be cool, and do whatever it takes to be in the “in” crowd.

I wonder how we are supposed to raise our daughters in this world where we can photoshop women’s bodies into unrealistic shapes, while having girls in their twenties make naked music videos while swinging on a giant ball, and having myriad synthetic drugs circulating at high school parties. I used to be terrified of normal things, but now I’m terrified of the friends she might make.

I know i”m jumping into the future… but as history is teaching me, the future is not so far off.

I know I’m about to commit parental sin here, and go against the grain with my opinion and all, but I wanted to explore a new angle in parenting…Everybody knows the old, “I’m not your friend, I’m your parent” slogan… To be really honest, that phrase has always really bothered me to the core for some reason. To me, you’re basically saying to your kid that a friend will let you do whatever you want… that a friend doesn’t have your best interests at heart, and has a selfish agenda of their own… and that a parents suck all of the “fun” out of life.

Now please do not mistake what I am trying to say here… a parent that lets their child do whatever they want because they are too tired to deal with poor behavior or wants to gain favor with their child is not what I am getting at. I am not giving parents carte blanche to give up at being a parent, but rather to encourage them to be a parent AND a friend. Most importantly to model what friendship behavior is all about.The last thing you want is rules that aren’t enforced, boundaries that are broken, and kids that are running wild right? But to continually tell our sons and and daughters, “I’m not your friend, i’m your parent” sends a broken message.

If we continuously teach our kids that you’re “Not their friend” (at least not between the ages of 5-18 then what are we saying about friendships in general?

According to Websters, a Friend is:
: a person who you like and enjoy being with
: a person who helps or supports someone or something

A parent is:
: one that begets or brings forth offspring
: a person who brings up and cares for another

Surely I fit both definitions, so by definition I AM my daughters friend too am I not? It is my absolute goal to teach my very impressionable daughter that friends do not simply let each other do what is popular, but rather a friend is someone to confine in… someone to hold you up when your world is falling apart, and someone to keep you accountable. Proverbs 24:26 says, ” An honest answer is like a kiss of friendship.” I challenge us to all to teach our daughters what real friend are…

I’m sure many of you have heard this quote before, and most people view that this is what friends are about….

Proverbs, so full of wisdom teaches in verses 27:17, ” As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”, and Proverbs 18:24 says, ” There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” I think the psalmist David says this so perfectly. There are “friends” who destroy each other, and who don’t ultimately care about your eternal happiness. They want to live in the moment. Be popular… be cool…. sit in jail with you… but real friends stick closer than a brother. They look out for you. Look out for your best interests. A real friend stands up for what is right, and the path that you should go down. Real friends sharpen each other and warn you of dangerous waters… help you get out of sticky situations, and lead you towards your ideals… not away from them.

My point is – a friend is someone to hold each other up. A companion in life. I do not want to teach my child that her friends can lead her down a path that is away from how I’ve brought her up… but instead to find friends that will support her upbringing. I want to teach my daughter that friends are not the ones who lead you away from your morals, and ideals but that they support you and your best interests. That friendship (especially between women) is not ultimately about competition, but parallel lives… that we should be standing up for one another, and supporting one another.

I know many people will say, “haha good luck with this”, but really… I encourage you to look deep about what we are teaching our children about friendship. As mothers, aren’t we the ones who are to model female behavior to our daughters? Let us stand up and show our daughters what female friendship is all about. That it is about being strong in our faith, and our ideals, even if it isn’t always popular. Standing up for what you believe in, and not giving a damn about what other people think of you. Because the only opinion that is worth anything… is that of our heavenly father.

My daughter is young, and I am offering my opinion blind… as I do not have a tween or a teen going through the emotional baggage of that timeline in our lives, but I strongly feel that we as parents are their early role model. In many cases, like it or not, we ARE their friend… so why do we have to officially wait until our children are in their twenties and thirties to be “their friend” and model good friendship behavior… Lets be their parent and their friend now… while it matters most.

Minnesota (er CA) – Week 10

Mar 15, 2014

Just two weeks ago we came home from a much needed break in Carlsbad California, near San Diego. Jason and I hadn’t been to California (where we used to live) in 9 years so it was super fun to be back. Here’s a down and dirty of our 7 day Vacation with photos of course!

Saturday 2/22
We arrived in Sunny and warm California! Our flight over was good, and K thought flying was pretty fun. After we got up to our hotel in Carlsbad we walked across the ocean and walked along. K thought the ocean was pretty cool until she got knocked over by a wave, and then she determined the ocean was no longer “fun” , or safe to be in.

K’s first time at the airport, and first time on the walkway.

Sunday 2/23
We hopped in the car and drove east for three hours to visit one of my very best friends from the Navy who now resides in Arizona. We had a picnic lunch with her and her family and the kiddos got to play at the park while Shawna & I drank wine. [side note: did you know that you can buy wine at the grocery store on Sundays in CA?] We drove through some remarkable scenery, but it was nice to be back at our hotel after a long day of driving.

Monday 2/24
We met up with our friend Lisa and her boyfriend Evan and headed down to SeaWorld. We all enjoyed looking at the animals, but K did not appreciate getting splashed by Shamu. (Probably didn’t help that the water was freezing!) Later we went out for dinner, and had steaks, lobsters and fish.

K feeding the seals at SeaWorld

Tuesday 2/25
Pool & beach day! We spent the day at the pool swimming in 66 degrees, and at the beach walking in the waves and enjoying fish tacos at the pier. Most of the locals had coats on, but we were hardy Minnesotans so 66 degrees felt like a great. I even managed to get sunburned pretty bad although we kept K covered in sunscreen. We met up later with my old boss from the Navy at a delicious Mexican restaurant. it was so fun to catch up.

As you can see we’re the only ones in the pool!

My favorite picture of Jason & K.

Wednesday 2/26
Back in the car for a day at San Diego Zoo. It was so much fun seeing all of the animals that we don’t have in MN including Koala bears, elephants, and kangaroos. K did an exceptional job walking what we can only guess was 5-6 miles. After the zoo we ate at West Steak and Seafood in Carlsbad. Our appetizer was crab cakes which were to die for! For dinner I had West Australian Loster tail and a glass of Frank Family Vineyards Chardonnay. Jason had a 40 day aged house special steak, and K had fancy macaroni & cheese. She did exceptional at this obvious fancy restaurant, and we even had a stranger come up to our table to tell us that K was very well behaved.

Thursday 2/27
We met up with our friends Lisa & Evan again and had breakfast together in Oceanside. Sadly, it was time to say goodbye to them as they had to return for work in AZ. After breakfast Jason and I headed north to the PCH (Pacific Coast Highway) and drove through Laguna, Huntington Beach, and then just kept going north. We drove through the ghettos of Long Beach & LA and then found ourself in magnificent Malibu. (which is just south of where we used to live). We drove through the canyon and hung out at the mall I used to work at in Thousand Oaks California. We then had a 3.5 hour drive back to our hotel in Carlsbad.

Making a sand castle at the abandoned Huntington Beach.

The PCH coming into Malibu.

Friday 2/28
Last day! We woke up to Typhoon like conditions so it wasn’t going to be a typical beach day, or outdoors day. We did stop and have breakfast at this cute cafe where I had the most delicious french toast! They made it out of Croissant rolls. It was to die for! After breakfast we drove around Carlsbad for a bit and stopped by another mall to walk around and beat the rain. After the mall we were heading back to the hotel when I asked Jason to drop me off down the beach (there was a break in the rain) and I walked along the beach while listening to some of my favorite songs (Oceans, Hillsong), and just prayed and stared out into the ocean that God made with his hands. It moved me to tears, but it was a cool moment.

Croissant french toast and a mimosa.

You call me out upon the waters…

Sea kelp washed up on the beach from the storm.

The beach which I walked upon.

Saturday 3/1
Sadly, our vacation came to an end… but waiting at home for us……

As of 3/14 – We have officially welcomed Niko into our home (just last night) and so far he’s doing great! Today he’s perked up quite a bit, and I think is starting to realize that we are his new pack. So far his “toy” is the cats tail. He grabbed it with his teeth and started playing tug of war with it until Kip bopped him in the head… and then he sat right in front of Niko waiving his tail in his face watching out of the corner of his eye.

We put him in the kennel a few times before “bed time”, and he howled. It was cute because we were still awake… but soon it was bedtime. Jason has the big kennel sectioned off and next to his side of the bed, so he slept sideways, and half off the bed with his hand by the kennel to reassure Niko. He actually did pretty good. We had our alarm set for every three hours to wake up and let him out. So far he’s only had two accidents in the house, and the rest have been outside. GO NIKO!

We plan to socialize today with some friends and reminisce over our trips (they were in Mexico). Jason’s brother Miah is bringing his Olde English Bulldog, and Boston Terrier to play. The three males in our larger pack getting together. We will have them meet in small doses. But I think they will get along great.

Down & Dirty Updates:
Miss K is doing exceptional at school. She is now reading small sentences with ease, and is doing exceptional at other subjects as well.

Me: I am the proud new owner of Kettelbells! Post vacation I’ve had absolutely ZERO desire to go to the gym. So this is something nice I can do at home, and will hopefully start running outside again. I have a few triathlons planned for this summer including a 5K I would love a good time at.

Jason: He has been busy building two beautiful permanent gates for the dogs at our house. Work is going well for him, and he’s been working in town since October which is such a huge blessing to us.

Minnesota – Week 9

Mar 8, 2014

Meet Niko {PupDate}

So as many of you know we lost our very sweet Eli last September. Its taken me until very recently to even talk about what happened. I can’t quite describe the grief I felt with loosing Eli.

Last September he had gotten sick, and after Web Md’ing him… I was convinced it was an obstruction. I had brought him to the vet who didn’t think that was the case. After probing him numerous times, he said no… he had just gotten into something. Well… a week went by and he didn’t get any better. The following Friday was the worst day of my life…. he was in septic shock when we woke up, we rushed him to the vet and were going to surgery but we were too late. He instead died a tragic death.

I completely blame the vet… but we’ve decided not to push legally on them. Sadly I learned a valuable lesson now that if you feel that something is wrong… Even if you are not “professional”, to trust your gut!

I haven’t cried so hard about anything… but loosing Eli… was something I can’t even describe in words. That kind of pain, and loss that we went through – are still going through….

Fast forward a few months later – Eli’s mama became pregnant again with a new litter (and a new dad)… and had his beautiful half brother Niko! (knee-coh). The day we picked him out {last Sunday} I fell absolutely in LOVE with him! I absolutely cannot wait to bring him home next weekend!

Socializing will be a bit more interesting since we still have 90 inches of snow on the ground, but I plan to bring him to the pet store as soon as he is all up to date on his shots, and i’ve heard rumors that the Home Depot will let you bring a pup in the cart with you…. so I plan to roam the aisles with Niko in the cart. Stay tuned for pictures of that!!!

As soon as its warm enough, you can bet your bottom dollar we will be down at Lake Calhoun, and Lake Harriet, and Market Fest in WBL…. and any parade near us we can find! 🙂 I am so looking forward to Niko’s arrival, and while he will never ever replace Eli, he has already won a special place in our hearts!

When your child doesn’t want to go to church….

Feb 22, 2014

Firstly, welcome to my new segmented blogging. This first “episode” is called Standing on Grace. I believe that God has lavished upon all of us the highest form of grace imaginable to man. Therefore as I live today I “Stand on Grace’….

For my post today….

Its not that my daughter doesn’t really want to go to church in general, but she only wants to go to a certain church…

About 8 years ago I “converted” from Catholicism to a more biblical christian approach. Really you could say that this started in the winter of 2002 when I was in Okinawa Japan serving in the United States Navy and began questioning everything. I spoke with our chaplain, and he very unbiasedly gave me an overview of the various denominations of Christianity. Today I guess I could consider myself Baptist… I was married by a retired Catholic priest, and my husband and I baptized our daughter Catholic/Christian, but about eight years ago I completely left the catholic church and began attending the largest church in Minnesota.

My husband is either agnostic or atheist. Sometimes he goes between the two… flat out saying there is no God, to saying he doesn’t really know. I honestly think he’s more apathetic than anything to matters of faith. Not wanting to put in any time to learning etc, or caring in general about doctrine. Conversely to this – he is very very supportive of allowing me to raise our daughter with a Christian upbringing.

After I quit going to the local catholic church I started out going to the largest church in Minnesota, and one of the largest in the country. They have absolutely phenomenal messages, worship music and kids programming, but because of its HUGE size [read: approximately 20-30 THOUSAND attendees] there were always pleas to “move to Saturdays”, and it could literally take 30-45 minutes just to get out of the church parking lot after a service. Because of this I started looking at other churches…

So last spring around the beginning of Lent I started looking for other churches for my daughter and I to attend. We tried out a few before settling on a wonderful church near our home. I quickly got involved with the community there with their amazing “House Groups”, and serving putting up the street signs…. but I noticed that more often than not my daughter did not want to come to church with me. She was always so excited to attend church, but since attending this new church for some reason she didn’t want to tell me about what she learned, or flat out didn’t want to go…. and the last time we went there I got called out of worship service because she was “sick”… but I don’t really think she was…

Since then, she just refuses to go to that church….

One weekend we were driving past our old church and she begged and pleaded for us to attend. It was a Saturday night, and they do have Saturday evening services, so we went. She was re-hooked, and excited about church again. Immediately wanting to memorize her, “bible memory verse” and telling me all about what she had learned.

So what am I to do?

Here I have this amazing [smaller] church that I adore, and that I am involved with serving, and in their community…. yet my child refuses to go… and yet she WANTS to go to this other completely amazing other church that “I found” inconvenient……?

Whenever I feel myself faced with a difficult decision I think its wise to look to the bible and see what God has to say. I found these:

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. Deuteronomy 6:6-9

You shall therefore lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, that your days and the days of your children may be multiplied in the land that the Lord swore to your fathers to give them, as long as the heavens are above the earth. Deuteronomy 11:18-21

Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea. Mark 9:42

The bible is clear that not training her up is not an option… so for now I’ve resolved to taking my daughter to the church she wants to go to, and listening to my “new” beloved church on podcast, and still staying involved with serving and community. A few times my daughter has said to me that she doesn’t want to go to any church, but my wonderful husband has told her that she isn’t old enough to make that decision yet. I’m so grateful to him for standing up for my faith and my upbringing of my daughter to the christian faith even though he doesn’t believe in it….

How easy would it be for him as an agnostic/atheist/apatheticist to say, “yeah church is dumb, you can stay home”… but he doesn’t. Although he doesn’t carry the same beliefs as I do, he still remains a wonderful spiritual leader in our home. I’m so thankful to God for him, and for his willingness to allow me to raise our daughter as a Christian. I think its so important for the father to be the spiritual leader in the home, and while my husband doesn’t share my Faith yet… I’m so grateful to God that he supports me.

Live Fearless

Jan 29, 2014

There is a reason why I don’t have pictures of my daughter swimming in the middle of the Border lakes on the Minnesota, Ontario border from last summer. My daughter was terrified of the unknown depths of the lake, and would not jump in where she could not see the bottom. She was perfectly content to stay on the beach while her cousins fearlessly leapt off the back of the houseboat, slid down the waterside, and went tubing down the watery highway. I could see it in her eyes though. The look that she wanted more, that she wanted to do those things too. I knew that she would have fun if she let go of her fear and just leapt, slid, and cruised.

I had seen her do it before many times at the park. Overcoming her fears only to be riled with glee and delight as she had that adrenaline rush of fun. But she wouldn’t budge on this. I wish I could tell you that I just let my daughter sit on the sidelines of the boat or on shore, but instead I gently dropped her down into the waters to my sister who was there to catch her. (She did have a life jacket on), but she wasn’t having it. A few days earlier I put her on my brothers lap and off they went down the slide, but she wasn’t ready for the thrill of that either. She almost got the courage to do it again, but that was the only time she went down the slide the whole trip or swam out in the deep. In my heart I could not push her to do something she truly didn’t want to do anymore.

This reminds me of the time I wanted her to become a figure skater just like I was! My sweet cousin graciously lent me her daughters old skates so I wouldn’t be out the money for a good sturdy pair of Rydels. I packed my daughter up and drove nearly an hour south to the skating school that was run by my cousins mother, and grandmother. The same duo that I had learned from and skated with all of those years. Sure there was a skate school much much closer to my house, but my Aunt truly is the best of the best in the state of Minnesota when it comes to Figure Skating! But, my daughter was scared and disliked every minute of it. It was something that I had wanted her to do, not something she picked out. How could I expect her to face her fears if she didn’t even like the activity she was doing in the first place?

So, we followed what she would want to do and signed her up for gymnastics. Even if we would find out that it would cost us more money… After all, it is her activity not mine, and its her life, not mine. The point of a sport to me, aside from the obvious physical activity portion is to stretch them beyond where they think or can imagine they can go. To show them with hard work, dedication, and living fearless they can reach their goals. She doesn’t always get a certain skill, and sometimes has to really work for it. But I think that this teaches her patience, perseverance, and endurance. Its the reason we do gymnastics!

My daughters gymnastic coach told me not too long ago that my little miss’ favorite phrase was, “I can’t”, or “It’s too hard”. But our coach has been working with her to get a mind set of, “I know its hard, and I know its scary, but I’m going to try it anyways.” For my little miss who has been overly cautious since she was in diapers and is virtually scared to try all things that “look scary”, this is huge! I am so thrilled that she is trying her very best at gymnastics. Letting go of her fear. She is pushing herself and is even now learning how to do a handstand on the balance beam and walkovers.

On a side note – we have my daughter in swimming lessons now, and she is getting to be quite the little swimmer. Like gymnastics her favorite phrase in swimming used to be “I can’t” or “Its too hard” and would constantly swim for the instructor instead of the island, grabbing on to them with such intensity as if she was going to drown, but recently… she has had a major mindset change. Now she is striving to be the best in her class. Swim fiercely, and swim fearlessly. The island seems to be too close now, and you can tell that her little spirit just wants to soar. I can’t tell you as her mother how proud I am watching her shed her skin of fear.

As parents I think its part of our responsibility to stretch our kids past where they think they can go. As a mother, I am responsible for my daughter. How she grows up, what kind of woman she will become some day, and I can only hope to help shape her attitude. We can’t force our kids to do what they don’t want to do, but if you find that nook, that niche that allows them to leap into the unknown. Grab it, and let them live fearless.

Little Blessed Life

Extraordinary Moments from Ordinary Living

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