Its been two months to the day now since my dad has been gone. That seems strange, and it seems like its been at least a year. Time is funny that way.
Last year my family (my parents, husband , kiddo, siblings and their families) all took a trip to Voyagers National Park via a Houseboat expedition. It wast the most unreal trip of my life! And since then I’ve been excited for family trips, but nothing like how I was excited for that trip. The time spent as family and the deep conversations that were invoked, the beauty of scenery were par none.
Just about a month ago I’ve become completely obsessive over my first trip into the BWCAW. Its something I’ve wanted to do for several years, but just in the past month I’ve felt an irresistible urge to go, and have gotten more excited over it so far, than perhaps I’ve gotten about anything…. ever. My husband daughter and I and maybe the dogs plan to go next summer, and if that goes well we will go each year. Hours have been poured into which route to take, what time of year would be best and what gear is critical for this trip. I’m so thankful that my husband is getting into it a bit as well.
My dad knew me… knows how much I enjoy nature and peace and adventure. I honestly feel like it is him and God that is leading me towards this trip. A trip for healing. Not only in the trip itself, but as my dad said when planning our trip to Voyagers last year, half the fun is in the planning and anticipation. I’m going to take this present- as a time to heal.
The author of Ecclesiastes shares that there is a time for everything.
This past weekend my husband, siblings (their spouses), and myself headed up to Madeline Island, Wisconsin. A vacation that we had planned for several months was a very welcome distraction and came with perfect timing! We were able to share memories, and also spend the majority of the time goofing off as siblings do! It was such a welcome distraction from the non-stop feeling that my world is falling apart.
I have a bit of a confession. I’ve heard from many of you who have admired my strength and my faith, but to be raw, and honest, and real… this past week I had been fretting over answered and unanswered prayers. Does God even hear me when I pray? Does he even care about my will, or is it all up to him? I laid awake last Tuesday night in hysterics thinking that God doesn’t hear me at all, and what even holds our universe let alone world in balance? I imagined our planet flying through space, and wondered desperately what holds us together? The prince of darkness tried to drench me with his lies that God is far away, and that he doesn’t care about anyone. But in an instant I was sobered when I took pause and read verses like:
Luke 12:24-34:Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life ? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? “Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. “Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.
Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
I even felt better when I read the words of Jesus when hanging on the cross cried out to God saying, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” which means “My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?” Matthew 27:46. Even Jesus himself questioned the Father, and He was not offended. The feeling is normal. Asking questions is completely normal.
The prince of darkness tried to make me stumble and fall, but I have the strength of Jesus Christ on my side, and have the treasures of His word in my heart. I know the real truth and the real story is that God loves me. He loves my dad, and He loves my family. It wasn’t Gods aim to make us feel like our world was falling apart, to cause us angst, or worry, or despair. But God loves us through it all. Through these messy times where we question him, and even wonder if He hears us he Loves us. When I doubt that my will is ever done He loves us. When we question if anyone in this world matters He loves us.
He is not offended by these questions, or when we stumble and fall, He is there to catch us, not stand by and be offended. He loves us, He loves us, He loves us!
#1 – Bring a big tent!
I absolutely cannot stress this enough! Having a big tent allows for a queen sized cot for my husband and I. A twin blow-up air mattress for our daughter and an extra large kennel for the dogs, plus room for our clothing, and to be away from the sides in case it were to rain. Someday I would like to own this one.
#2 – Pack sufficiently
This is really a pro-and con statement. I’ve gotten smarter about what to pack and what to leave at home, but I usually bring WAY TOO MUCH STUFF! And WAY TOO MUCH FOOD!!!! I re-purposed these pullout drawers to stack our silverware, clicker lighter, and other cooking utensils. etc so I don’t have to go digging around a huge bin looking for a fork when I’ve come off the lake after dark to start cooking dinner.
Not my photo (but I do the same thing) – click the picture for the source
#3 – Bring games for the kids!
With most of us being adults its important to bring stuff that the kids will enjoy too! I’ve found going to the dollar store to stock up on glow sticks, and other toys is a fantastic idea – because if anything gets lost or broken ya only spent a buck on it. Plus the dollar store has different kinds of toy type things than regular stores. I’ve also printed off sheets of scavenger hunts which has been a huge hit!
#4 – Don’t spread out too much!
We learned this one the hard way this last time we went camping. We had our tent on one end of the camp… dropped some stuff off about 300 feet away from our tent, and our kitchen was another 500 feet away from that. This made everything completely ridiculous in terms of packing up, and took much longer than expected. Next time we will put our kitchen right next to our tent, which will be right next to our truck and so-forth.
Week 20 of 2014! We are sadly, almost half way through yet another year – and only now at week 20 are things finally underway in the Spring department! Today we hit an astonishing 85 degrees!
K officially started soccer practice, and today at practice it was my task to bring the treats! (each parent brings each week, and I happened to be the first one)Oh what pressure.
I mean – as the first one… I am the person who will set the stage for snacks to come. Will “my snacks” suck? I wanted to bring something healthy, but not 100% overboard in the crunchy department. Truth – I would not be handing my daughters teammates dried edamame or pancetta wrapped asparagus with cream cheese.
K had a blast playing. Meanwhile I was handed her soccer uniform which was just too cute, as well as a car decal (which I am becoming dangerously close to having THIS car…
and a card that I had to sign that I swore not to be a douche bag parent that yells at the kids, coach or referees.
Well, we just returned home from another amazing trip up to Lake Lydick. If you click on the picture tab you can see our photos from up north. The weather was forecasted to be raining almost the entire time, but it only really rained on the over nights which was A-OK. K has grown up amazingly. She ran off with Jerry, Cash, Kayleigh, or Logan much of the time and ignored mom and dad. She was in good hands, and it was kind of bittersweet to see her with such growing independence. Everyone slaughtered the lake with fishing. We all came home with our limit of bass, sunnies and crappies. I caught “the one that got away”, probably 1-2lb crappie, and it got off my line right as I was trying to get it in the big boat (I was in my kayak). We sat by the fire, shared stories, roasted marshmallows and enjoyed amazing company. Of course I was sick (as I almost always am on Lydick) – this time with Laryngitis, so no debating anything for me. Maybe it was a sign? 🙂 We’re hoping to get a HUGE jump on our boat this upcoming weekend so that we can pop it in the lake nearby and keep catching the fishies! 🙂
It was a great weekend! Earlier in the week Kirra was wanting a sleepover, so we called my nieces to see if they’d like to sleep over. Well my older niece had a dance competition, so Gabby (the one the same age as Kirra) slept over. It was so much fun. Friday night they played barbies, legos, babies, and more. They loved it and I did too since they entertained each other the entire night. I put a movie on for them, and they fell asleep around 10pm. They woke up promptly at 8:00 a.m. where we had a pancake making party! They helped watch, we cranked up the tunes, and it was Disney Kareoke/musical! (Yes I am a HIGHLY entertaining sitter/Mother/Auntie). Unfortunately we had to cut the sleepover/playdate short on Saturday. Ally was dancing, and Gabby had to get back to watch, and I was heading off to our annual neighborhood garage sale with my Mother-In-Law where literally HUNDREDS of sales are going on in a 2 mile radius! We had Kirra with as well, and I was a tiny bit nervous on how she’d do, but it was like shopping with a 25 year old. She did so great. She didn’t whine once, she listened perfectly, and was in a great mood the entire time! I couldn’t have asked for a better group of gals to hang out with for the day! We scored with clothing for little miss at a VERY great deal- as in “fill this bag full of clothes for just $5” or “fill this bag of clothes for $1”. Granted that was around Closing time, still it was GREAT! We finished up around 6pm, and I had company coming over at 8pm for a little girls night. Kirra stayed up until around 11pm, but was great throughout the night. The dogs were acting crazy – as in breaking (chewing through) all of the leashes, so now Sadie is let out without being tethered. I think she knows how lucky she is because she too has been exceptional! The night with the girls was great! I definitely needed some adult time. I was woken about 6:00 a.m. by my daughter who in not so many words required a bath. I was so tired from the night before, but mothers duties called. Jason was up north at fishing opener, so I gently washed her, and got her tucked back into bed and me as well. She graciously slept until 10:30 a.m. when she woke me with a gentle kiss and asked if it was Mother’s Day. I said yes, and she kissed again and wished me a happy mothers day. She is so sweet, and I don’t know why I deserve her! She is so perfect and precious. Was going to go kayaking today, but then Frank & Theo gave us their old fishing boat. It needs a little work, but with a little elbow grease we were able to gut the wood
It was a nice weekend! At times I felt so tired I could fall asleep at any moment,and at other times it was so nice to get so much done. Friday night I dropped Kirra off at Grandma & Grandpa’s house and then decided instead of Target, I’d stop at the Super Walmart since it was on the way home. Super Walmart is essentially now dead to me. They only had non-organic, or questionable brands of meat, and because I never shop there it was difficut to find certain things. I did manage however to stock up on lots of frozen vegetables and the largest tub of peanut butter short of going to Costco I’ve ever seen. Kirra LOVES Peanut Butter & Honey for school lunch,just like her mama, so we’re now going through PB super fast. I went home and decided I would just do Coborns Delivers and make a list. I skyped with Jason, and I had told him I had to wake up extra early Saturday because I needed a car wash since I was the official race vehicle for a work event the next day. I wasn’t about to have a dirty car going around the course. So he mentioned that because it was going to be below zero I shoud get a car wash on Friday night… because often times they close if is less than 5 degrees out. So I left and took a detour to Target where i picked up the rest of my grogeries for the week. Oh I love you Target. Saturday I woke up at the butt crack of dawn and headed out to the race. I had stayed up watching TV shows the night before so I had about 5 hours or less of sleep. The race went wonderful! Despite the cold weather nearly all of my volunteers showed up! YAY for Volunteers. Afterwards a few of us went to Cooper for the “post race” party, which was coming to a close by the time that we unloaded the “truck” and got over there. I had mushroom pizza, and it was great conversation, and great company! Then I was off to a new salon near my work. I got hight lights,and low lights put in,and while I wasn’t planning on it,I got a hair cut as well to even out some of my very odd layers that had grown in because of an odd hair cut a year or so ago. I was very happy with the results. I ran home and got the dogs, and then headed to Frank & Theo’s to get Kirra, and have dinner. We ordered from the Blacksmith, a favorite in our family, and again had great conversation. Kirra bless her went straight to bed so that I could also go straight to bed at 11pm. I was absolutely exhausted! Today we woke up around 9:30 a.m. (Thank you Kirra for letting mommy catch up on some sleep). We had breakfast,and Kirra played some online games while I cleaned. I decided to burn the Christmas tree,and almost started the whole yard on fire. I’m semi certain in hindsight that there was a fire ban due to the extremely dry conditions. I’ve never burned a Christmas tree before, so I had no idea how HUGE this bonfire was going to be,and because everything was so dry,our grass immediately caught fire around the fire pit…. I did manage to get that part out, but it took me the better half of the day to get the fire out. Because it wasn’t a real emergency I didn’t want to use the hose,and run the risk of wrecking our pipes/outdoor faucet,so i poured coffee pots of water on the fire pit all day. I wish I had waited until this weekend to have said fire,because it was my best fire yet, and it burned EVERYTHING that was in the fire pit. I’m now sitting around a contained fire in our fire place,sipping on some Tempranillo, and blogging. Will be hitting the hay early again tonight since i’m quite down on sleep. That’s wraps up the Weekend Re-Cap.
Today was Kirra’s race – the TC Kids Fieldhouse Fun Run. The race was held at the University of Minnesota Fieldhouse and was on the same 200 meter track that U of M athletes practice on! Kirra ran the Half Mile which is four laps or according to Kirra, 4 Miles. The kids all ran in “heats” according to their age group with the little ones running first. There were two “heats” of Pre-School/Kindergarten kiddo’s and Kirra was in the first heat. She had so much fun running around the track. She wasn’t very fast, but she was looking all around, and really enjoying herself. She ended up running three laps, but ran the whole time. I was pretty proud of her for going out there by herself,and I know she felt awesome to do a race all by herself! I’m sad we’ll miss the TC Kids Cross Country Fun Run in May, but maybe we can find another half mile for her to do in the spring. Of all of the things we’ve had her try out, running has been her favorite. I wish I would have gotten more pictures, but here is her race number and medal that she “won” for running super fast. (All of the kids got medals). After her “heat” we cheered on other runners, and Kirra was VERY into the cheering. At one point I looked at Kirra and yelled, “Woo Hoo” as a bunch of runners went by and she said,”No mamma, cheer for THEM!” and pointed to the runners. She’s too smart for my own good. It was a super fabulous Saturday! Also – here are some outdoor pictures at the U of M Campus this morning. We awoke to frost, and light snow that blanketed the trees with gorgeous white as if someone spray painted them that way!
We got things going around 10:00 a.m. on Saturday after sleeping in a bit, and dodging tackles from Kirra yelling,”lets go, lets go, lets go”. We still had to load up the truck, and get a few things out of the garage. Finally around noon we were on the road! I drove most of the way and actually enjoyed it! We were headed up to Marcell on Big Ole (ol) Lake, which I thought was called ole… but everyone else pronounced it Oh-lee. It took us around 3 hours and 20 minutes for the trek. Once there I took the Kayak out on the water and took a spin around the lake. About 8 feet in front of me was a GIANT loon. It never dipped in under the water, but instead spoke to me with its cries, and flew right on top of the water. I followed it around the lake for a while, until I decided I was probably annoying the poor bird. We stayed up pretty late playing Scategories (Frank’s new favorite game which he loves to call scrabalicious). Poor Kirra ate WAAAYYY too much junkfood however the first night and upchucked all over grandma and grandpa’s room… well… mostly on the dog, and on herself. We got her all cleaned up, and she was just fine. The next morning after breakfast, Theo, Jason, Kirra and I decided to take the paddle boat out for fishing. Which would have been a fantastic idea, however the paddle boat didn’t paddle very well, so we got about 10 feet in 15 minutes… we turned around and grabbed the row boat which had oars since the only motorboat was already spoken for. Jason rowed out around a point, and into another bay in the lake… after we had our fill of fishing we tried paddling back to the dock, but the wind had picked up something fierce, and an oar broke at the handle!! Jason took his hemostats and got the bracket of the oar off and re-attached it lower, so now we had one long oar, and one short oar. Paddle, paddle, paddle, SNAP! The other oar broke off too! So now we were actually stranded. We waved, and yelled to the other boat across the lake, but it was of no use, so I told Jason to drop me off at the lake bank and i would try to hike back… which would be a great idea minus the 80 degree slope of the hill side! It was nearly vertical and a very difficult hike… I literally had to grab hold of things, and some trees which looked very sturdy just fell and rolled down the hill into the lake… I probably made it a quarter of a mile and the other boat finally saw Jason, Theo and Kirra… and then rescued me up stream. It was a cocktail worthy adventure to say the least. Also on the trip we went on a hike to Joyce Estate. It was a three mile hike in to see it, and a three mile hike out, so for you math lovers, that’s six miles total! We didn’t have a hiking pack for Kirra so Jason and I took turns carying her,and letting her walk on her own. Kirra walked probably three miles herself all together, and was very very tired. I couldn’t blame her. Plus the mosquitos were getting us like something else! Six miles didn’t sound as far as it felt! We also dined in style while up there making homemade gourmet pizza with Jason’s homemade secret sauce… my toasted angel hair pasta with sausage and peppers, and Pam,Theo & Sue Sue made us a turkey dinner complete with Potatoes, stuffed mushrooms, zuccini (veggie lasagna), and more! Fishing was okay. Most fish we pulled up (when we did) were 3″ long. And by long i mean short. They were the tiniest fish I’ve ever seen. I caught a bass that was only about 5 inches long, and 1 inch thick! Kirra even held him up by the lip! She caught a few fish herself, and I did manage to catch a keepable sunny, and DID catch a Northern as well! Actually – i was the ONLY one to catch anything that was keepable! Wooo Hooo!!!! The trip was wonderful,and i’m already looking forward to Killwory in January!
This past weekend J and I celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary! To celebrate we took a trip up to Bayfield Wisconsin/Madeline Island.
We left on Friday around 2:30pm after we dropped off Kirra and Tyler with the in-laws.
We stopped along the Namekagon river a few times to snap photos and check out canoe trips for the future. Around 6pm or so we finally pulled into our Cottage. Woodside Cottages. Coincidently and no prior planning these are the same cottages J’s co-workers stay in every winter. Soon we met our cabin hosts who might just be the sweetest people on earth. Gary – gave us the area run down and a few pointers…and even called us dinner reservations.
We got situated in the room and were off to downtown Bayfield to take a quick look at things before dinner and buy some wine.
Dinner was at Wild Rice Restaurant. My new favorite place ever! The food and atmosphere were simply to die for. Jason had Bison with prosciutto wrapped asparagus, and I had Whitefish and Trout.
Saturday we woke up and headed up to the Apostle Islands Golf Course. We decided to play just 9 holes since we still wanted to head over to Madeline Island via bicycle. We unfortunately got caught behind a group that took 3… yes THREE hours to play 9 holes. We couldn’t even believe it. When we got back to the club house we mentioned something to management so they bought us a free round at the clubhouse.
Finally – around 3pm we were off for Madeline Island. We got on the ferry and went exploring. Our first stop was Tom’s Burned down Cafe,however they had no bathrooms so we headed to Grandpa Tony’s instead. There we had some pizza and then headed off to Big Bay State Park looking for cliffs. We found no cliffs, but the beach was kind of pretty… but crowded,so we headed off into the woods for a little hike to the lagoon.
The hike would have been better… if we were wearing appropriate footwear, and had mosquito repellent on. The path wasn’t really a path…it was just a barely there path that you could kind of decipher. I put J in charge of deciphering where to go. Meanwhile I was getting eaten alive by mosquitos and deer flies. It was just awful. I just wanted to take a bath in Benadryl gel. We eventually found the lagoon, but still had about a mile to hike in, so we gave up after 35 minutes of hiking and headed back. On our way back we saw Darla the deer!
We biked back and went back to Toms Burned Down Cafe for a drink. They do not lack in alcohol or skimp at all on Madeline Island!!! We headed back towards the ferry, but it had just taken off so we went to the Beach Club for another cocktail where they again didn’t disappoint. Plus their views of Lake Superior was amazing!
Sadly it was time to get back to Bayfield but we decided to come back each year on our anniversary weekend. We got in and headed to some hotel bar that had a huge deck overlooking Lake Superior. We stayed there for several hours abandoning our cares of riding our bikes back to the cottage in the dark (I had a back light at least).
We were starting to get hungry but unfortunately we weren’t finding any food.
Finally we found Morts Pub a hole in the wall bar that had so-so food, but I wasn’t completely sober so it didn’t bother me too much. I even tried to play the piano at the bar,and did a so-so job…. but again… I wasn’t completely sober…. 🙂
Today we woke up late and packed up to drive the four hours back home. It was a wonderful trip and I can’t wait to go back again next year!!!!
Little Blessed Life 
